I've been trying to decide how to arrange this post so that it's actually useful for some of you. I think I'll start at the beginning. I mean when you get home from the honeymoon, here is what you'll need to do, and in approximately this order. I'll give you the acronym, followed by the meaning in parenthesis. After a while, you won't remember or care what all the letters stand for. You'll just know them. When you first get to a post, you'll get bombarded with a ton of papers, brochures, and folders of information (at least they DO give you a local map in there somewhere - that's been useful). I've tried to narrow it down to the things that I think are most important.
Get enrolled in DEERS (Defense Enrollment Eligibility Reporting System). This puts you on record as a dependent of a soldier. He'll have to add you to TriCare (health insurance) and life insurance separately, but you have to be in DEERS first.
Once you're in DEERS, get an ID card. You'll have to go with your husband to get it, so make him get all the paperwork. I'm sorry, but at this point it's been nearly two years since I've done that part, and I just don't remember how it went. You will not want to lose your ID card under any circumstances. It's your passport to get on and off post, proof to back up your health insurance card, and to make purchases at the commissary and PX (Post Exchange - those are the tax-free grocery store and tax-free department store, respectively). ID cards can be replaced, but it is much much much more difficult than getting a new driver's license. I think the police have to get involved. Just don't lose your ID card.
Your husband's unit's FRG (family readiness group - spouses and friends of the soldiers) should be giving you a welcome call to offer guidance on what to do next. Mine didn't so I was a bit lost. You'll definitely want to get plugged in with them, though. In case you slip through the cracks, you'll need your husband (or fiance) to get the names of your FRG leaders (usually the spouses of a senior officer and a senior enlisted soldier) and their contact information. Another term you might hear is the FRSA. The FRSA (Family Readiness Senior Advisor) is a paid civilian that is sort of the liason between the unit's commander and the FRG. He or she helps insure accurate and efficient flow of information between the two.
In any case, once you talk to the FRG, they should be able to point you in the right direction for whatever services you need on post. There is income tax filing assistance, free (and off the record) counseling, a thrift store, all kinds of things you may not know about otherwise.
Now that you have your ID card and can get on post without your husband, the first place you should find is ACS (Army Community Services). They are the ones that run or coordinate most of the spouse support services. They can help you with federal/on-post employment, as well as helping to direct you to other services. They host a "lending closet" for families that have found housing, but haven't received their belongings from the movers yet. The lending closet has folding tables and chairs, sleeping mats, pots and pans, and other simple household goods.
Another service ACS offers are the AFTB classes (Army Family Team Building). There are three levels. I've just finished the first one. It would be helpful if you're brand new to Army life. The class covers a lot of the services offered on post, as well as some basics of Army life and traditions.
The other major thing I haven't really talked about is housing. It varies so much from post to post that my experience here won't be very helpful. My best advice is to call as far in advance to see what your post's housing situation is. If you need to be on a waiting list, get on it as soon as possible. If the housing is very limited like it was here, you may want to make an advance trip to find a house or apartment so you can be sure to get a place you really want to live. You'll be glad you did.
This post wasn't that long, but it feels overwhelming to me - and I'm the one who wrote it. If you need any help please just ask me. I'd be happy to help you get through whatever it is.
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